N/A

//

The eyes, that at almost any given moment are warm, filled with welcome and willing, fell weary in a memory. 

A body usually bold and bright went limp in that moment, remembering the day his knees became weak. 

He, my hero, became half while his eyes closed and body sank into the dirt beneath his clenched fists. 

// 

8-24-14 

To my Aaron, 

You inspire me. You demonstrate such strength, every minute of everyday. You walk through life with the utmost ultimate grace. Even on the hardest days. You amaze me with every step you take. You are my best friend, confidant,  inspiration, strength, soul-mate and husband. You are my reason to pursue anything and everything without fear. 

I love you. 

hoy en día en fotos (18)

8:08AM 

12:45PM

1:11PM 

1:12PM

2:47PM

2:52PM

4:27PM

5:13PM

5:14PM

6:00PM

7:55PM

Anna. 

Sweet Nothings

My husband took his hand away from his phone for three minutes straight while I tried to take this photo for my "hoy en día en fotos". He never even questioned it. 

And before that he stopped what he was doing, completely, to look at my photos, just because I asked him to. 

And before all that, he sat out on our patio and listened to me go through my day, step by step.. Before even opening his mouth to tell me about his. 

And before he told me about his, he told me how much he appreciated me and adored me for all the "sweet nothings" I do for him, like making him toast for breakfast this morning. 

My husband is sweet. Not a sweet nothing, but my sweet everything. I love him more than even I can understand. 

I love you, Aaron. 

Anna. 

A Love For Loneliness

I can never get past it, but I don't ever want to. When the room is lit with only the soft light from a small desk lamp and Regina Spektor just happens to pop up on my Pandora, my heart instantly fills full of this strange sorrow. There aren't even words to describe where it puts me. It sends me back to days of heartache and loneliness, but the feeling is so, so full of beauty. I hate to sound dramatic, but it's the only way to describe it, in a very large, unfamiliar nutshell.

But I love it. I long for the feeling when things seem to become too routine, too normal. It's the reason I keep a "Norah Jones" station on my Pandora. And the reason I lock myself in a small room with just the glow of a lamp. I love the bittersweet feeling of it.

And sometimes I just have to be dramatic and indulge in these feelings. I have to listen to this music and embrace the memories that come flooding back into my head and heart. Then as those pass, this wonderful feeling of nothing overflows me and I am filled with peace. It's here that I connect best with myself and where I am able to think with a clear head. I am able to have those much needed conversations with my thoughts and just think for me. It's in these moments that I do nothing for anyone but all for myself.

It's a time for nothing. 




Anna.

hoy en día en fotos (7)

8:49AM

10:10AM

10:31AM

12:00PM

12:15PM

12:50PM

1:35PM

3:09PM

5:10PM

6:59PM

7:47PM

10:30PM

Anna. 

hoy en día en fotos (3)

5:28AM

6:33AM

7:41AM

8:29AM

9:41AM

10:44AM

3:08PM

4:13PM

5:09PM

5:37PM

7:09PM

7:32PM

7:49PM

8:42PM

Anna. 

He's Asleep & Snoring. Loudly.

It's 10:54 on a Tuesday night and Aaron is fast asleep. Pictured above is not right now, but it's about what it looks like. Usually I can fall asleep with him, but my mind is wondering tonight and I've done all the social media besides this one.. So I figured, why the hell not? Right? 

Today's been good. In fact, today has been quote, "the best day of my life." Why you wonder? No reason, I simply woke up next to someone I care about, dearly, and was fortunate enough to go to a job. Like I said, nothing special. But I woke up, I got to live another day and love in it. It's the simplicity of life and the things in it that I am grateful for. Mom and I talked about this topic today. I think she was impressed on my thinking. I like when mom is impressed, it makes me feel good. 

... But enough of enough. It's 11:00 and I've got to fall asleep eventually. Plus, I've got to be prepared for the next best.

Anna ... And Aaron, only cause he's so close, and snoring so loudly.

It's Been Six Saturdays

        A new mug from my eldest sister

Aleela, my sister bought me this mug yesterday. A sweet gesture that tugged at my over-tugged heart strings. I love her. 

Anyways, six Saturdays. It has been six Saturdays since I've waken up to a completely blank agenda. If you know anything about me, it's that I live for nothing. Not living for nothing, I live for my family, for love, for happiness and for the small things. But I love, and live for the sweet aroma of nothing. Doing nothing, thinking nothing and simply just the slow pace of a day full of nothing. 

It is 12:19PM, and I woke up only two hours ago. Since I've been up I have made coffee, cuddled my fiancé and watched three episodes of my new favorite netflix addiction. I've also changed out of my pjs to a more comfortable pair of sweats. It has been a sweet, sweet morning. I have longed for this morning for six Saturdays. 

And it can only get better. There are no plans for today. No drives arranged, no messages have even sent my way and no one has tried to contact me or Aaron. Crossing my fingers it stays this way. 

I don't have much else to say besides what I have already. So here's to this sixth Saturday and super comfy sweat pants. Super sexy sweat pants. So phones off. I've got a shoulder to cuddle on and some Olivia Pope to watch. 

Anna.  

Guess What, Guys?

A Picture Evan Took 

I'm LEAVING FOR FLORIDA

(t-minus six days)

This time will be a wee bit different though. No early morning walks on the beach with my sweetheart, no walks around St. Pete buying fake wedding rings, no kisses by "Porno Pat"and no late night talks about moving and raising a family in Florida. I get a little teary eyed thinking like that, I'll miss his sweet smile as he follows me around. Here's to wishing you were hoping on that plane with me, Evan. And here's to wishing we were who we once were. I love you. 

BUT! 

This time will be a lot of lazy days spent on the beach, late night walks with sisters who I don't see nearly enough of, early morning self time and beer drinking all to myself. 

I'm nervous. I know every turn of a corner will remind me of him and make me wish he was with, but I'll keep strong. I'm spoil myself and I will appreciate the time alone. 

Regardless, this is a much needed mini-vacation for me. I will enjoy every second of it, happy and sad. Memories are nice, everyone needs them. 

See you when I get back! 

Anna. 

Ten Things I'm Thinking About This Morning

..... That was much to long of a blog title.

1. The Foo Fighters station on Pandora is my all time favorite.
2. I don't feel like going to work in an hour. Nor am I ready to do that.
3. These damn braces better come off my face soon. Else I'm going to do some crazy things.
4. Take your vitamins. (talking to myself)
5. One pot of coffee down, how about another, Anna? (I said this one aloud)
6. Makeup is the worst.
7. I hope my music isn't as loud and distracting for my neighbors was last night. But then again, he deserves this wake up call.
8. Stupid stupid stupid stupid boy.
9. Haircut. Baha, probably not though.
10. I love this apartment and I really wish I could be inside of it more.





Anna.

Sometimes I Forget

I forget a lot of things, a lot of the time. But sometimes I forget how many amazing people I have the privilege of sharing this crazy life with but then I usually remember and I smile. One of those people reminded me tonight of how lucky I am to have her in my life; I won't name names or say anything to make it obvious. She didn't do anything outrageous or unforgettable tonight, in fact, she wouldn't even know, but she put a smile on my face and I just wanted to tell all of you how grateful I am for her. So thanks, you. I'm happy you're apart of my life.

What else can I say?

I've been busy, but I haven't yet forgotten about the blog! I think about it a whole lot actually. Little things throughout the day make me want to jump on a computer and write about them. I just literally don't ever get to a computer. But hey, here I am, typing away and it feels nice.

Here's something, my niece is going to turn ONE in a few days. I haven't talked much about her, but the little one stole my heart last year and I couldn't be a more crazy-obssesed-spoiling-grateful-aunt if I tried. She's the light of my life and not a single day goes by that I don't think of her. Another one of those people I am overly thankful to have in my life.

So, here's to you, everyone. Thanks for anything and everything you may have or might do sometime. I am thankful for you. Good relationships are like nothing else.


Anna.

(No picture today, I don't have the energy. But thanks for reading!)

Bahh.

Holy crap, this night isn't going to end, ever. Or so it feels that way right now. 

I'll just get this out of the way, Happy (late) Valentines Day everyone or anyone reading. I know I'm a few hours and a smile short, but this day has literally been non-stop and it seems more like a stretch of three days that I didn't sleep through. Holy shit. 

Run-on. 

See that sweet little screen shot up there? That's the screen I've been starting at for the past four hours. Here's a short window into my life, I work two (maybe three soon) jobs and one of them is a wood-fired pizza joint downtown Stillwater. I love this place and I'd love to go into detail right now but I just can't, I wouldn't give credit where credit is due because I would rush and that's just not fair. So, sometimes I do this kind of stuff for QuickFire (pizza joint). I love doing it, it really is more fun than it is work, but lately I've been struggling with my creative side and that just doesn't go over well when there's deadlines and shit. 

Share the pain with me? Alllright. But besides that, my Valentines Day was fun and actually I'm feeling pretty cool. But, just wanted to drop in and say hi.

Anna. 

Happy Birthday, Mom!

It's my mom's birthday today, technically tomorrow but I won't have a second to spare in the
morning, so I'm getting a head start. The few past times I've started blogs, it has always been around someone's birthday. I don't know if that's some sort of subconscious thing, but it always is. Anyways, back to mom. 

That's her up there. Isn't she beautiful? She really is. She's my super hero, that woman. I won't even try to put all she has done into words. The lady is all around amazing. She lives a life to look up to and I wouldn't trade anything in this world to have her any other way. I'm not a very spiritual person, but I do feel blessed beyond belief when it comes to the category of "moms" and who I was put on this earth with. 

Like before, I'm sure anyone reading this knows her; if you know me personally, then you know my mom. She's in my day to day life quite a bit. Sometimes not as much as I wish and other times more than asked for, but every minute with her is a minute I am thankful for. 

Long story short, I love my mom. I can honestly say that she makes my life a good one to live. She always has. She has been my best friend since I can remember and I don't go a day without realizing how truly lucky I am to be her daughter. 

So, here's to you mom;

Thank you for being who you are. Thank you for being my mom. You have showed me how to appreciate this life and you continue to teach me the lessons that I know will hold me together as I grow. I hope that one day I do for someone what you have already done for me a million times. You are truly my godsend and I couldn't imagine a life without you as my mom. 

I love you! 

Anna.